Thursday, March 31, 2011

Two is better than one

Due to technical difficulties - and exhaustion - I didn't post yesterday. Isn't it odd how we always have to make up excuses? Thus, today is a double post!
Anyway, today I'm eighty-sixing (to Goodwill) another pair of sunglasses and a bottle of Glucosamine Chondroitin (to a friend at work). The former were another one of my impulse gas stations buys, the latter I bought for my knees. After years of athletic abuse - which continues to this day - I thought I would take some of this to build back all that cartilage that I wore out. But, after buying it and removing the safety seal, I learned that it contains shellfish. Hence, a direct violation of my vegetarian lifestyle. The problem is that it says they expired on 2/09, so who knows if their any good. I'll let my co-worker be the judge of that. The thing is I think I paid a pretty penny for these horse pills - something like $15 - so it's still worth trying to give to someone else. I did find out that you can buy a vegetarian version, so I'll look into that (I'm sure they cost even more).

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Cyclops

I like sunglasses. I used to have a nasty habit of buying a pair on a regular basis at truck stops I frequented for gas during my trips back and forth to law school. My car always contacted a back-up pair for my back-up pair. Then, I was given a pair of really nice sunglasses from one of my friends and I decided that one nice pair of sunglasses is all one really needs. Thus, I think I can eighty-six some of the old ones, particularly this pair (for obvious reasons). Too bad, I really looked cool in them...

Monday, March 28, 2011

Let there be (book) light

The book light has gone through many a transformation since it's early beginnings. I've had many book lights, but my first was a chunky one from I think Borders (which is pretty much closing down and is killing me..where can I go hide at lunch now?). The problem with my first book light is that it weighs so much there is no way to even put it on the book to read it. Besides, book lights seems to be going the way of books - the dodo bird. It seems we will all eventually have to adjust to a world of ebooks. I'm sure Gutenberg's monument in Mainz will soon be holding a Kindle instead of a real book. This makes me want to cry every time I think about it, as a writer and a self-proclaimed bibliophile, but it's the sad reality of things.
I will say that I'm only eighty-sixing my first book light because it's too bulky to be practical, not because I've completely abandoned books in print. That would be insane.
Photo soon to follow...stay tuned.

Here it is (and only a day later!):

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Stop hanging around

As promised, two posts in one day! This second post is about a blue lanyard. It's completely generic, has no insignia (that's a first), and has been hanging in the hallway downstairs for years. I already have one of these for work, and another one in my desk at work, so there is no point in this redundancy! Thus, in the trash it goes. Besides, I'll probably get a couple more of them at a conference or two this year that I attend (the whole time I'll be lamenting about the lack of sticky notes).

Useless cables

I found a drawer full of cables. I know they've been in there a long time as I've never used any of them. I don't have enough technology know-how to even understand what they go to. Mark inspected them and came to the conclusion that I should see what they go to before throwing them out - I told him OK, but this probably just means they'll go back in a drawer for another few years until I actually throw them out. I don't have the time to cross-reference cable ends to all of the pieces of technology I own. But, there was one he approved eighty-sixing; not even his technology-minded brain can figure out what it goes to. I think finding all of these cables has been good for me; in the future I will use a marker to mark them so I can distinguish what they are supposed to be used for (and then I expect they will still go in a drawer for several years before I rid myself of them!).
I will have one more eighty-six later today - to make up for yesterday - stand by.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Eye Opener

I like to try new face stuff on occasion. During a weak moment, I bought some Neutrogena "Instant Eye Reliever." As someone who has trouble sleeping, I thought it would help with my dark circles that I sometimes get. First off, Neutrogena is a child company to Johnson & Johnson. As long as I've ever known, the latter tests on animals. If I'm wrong, feel free to correct me (I know I'm not). Thus, it must have been a seriously weak moment when I bought this product. Second, for a product that you are supposed to put around your eye, I've never had something burn as much as this product does when it inadvertently gets in my eyes. It just happens - even if you're super careful - that a product you put around your eyes will get in your eyes at some point. Third, I didn't notice any difference.
Thus, this product is eighty-sixed.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Not safe for climbing

Nowadays it seems like every time I go to a conference I get one of those faux mountain climbing clips with an endorsement/company name on it. I had three hanging down in the hallway for at least a year. I took them to work today, careful to remind the person I gave them to that they aren't for climbing.
I remember when people gave sticky notes and awesome pens out at conferences. I miss those days. You can't ever go wrong with sticky notes and pens and you can never have too many. One you have more than one climbing clip - as I use one for my keys - you're pretty much set.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Via Con Dios, Hal

It can't be - I didn't post yesterday? Where does the time go? When you're editing a manuscript time gets away from you - sorry!
Today's eighty-six is sentimental for me. It's a book titled Bettas: A Complete Introduction. I guess it's hard for me because it's a book - and if you knew me you'd know I never get rid of books - and the other reason is Hal. He was our first pet. He was a beautiful blue and red Betta. He was such a good pet. I discovered for a Betta he lived a long time, like two years. We were glad to have him while he was here. I've been holding on to this book because of my feelings for Hal. and that's just silly. But, to add some humor to this, no one needs a book on bettas. You simply get one, put it in some water, feed it fishy food, and it lives! It's the easiest and most fun pet yet (as they are aggressive and assert behaviors that are fun to watch).
Maybe some day, when I feel like talking about it, I'll share Hal's demise on this blog. Not tonight.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Wiped out

I discovered it behind the dryer. It was abused, abandoned, and no longer viable for its original purpose. You see, we keep the toilet paper in a storage area over the washer and dryer. Apparently, a roll fell behind the dryer. I found it when I flung a sock back there and had to retrieve it. The roll had obviously been back there for some time. I really wish I would have got a photo of it before I threw it away - so you could admire the lint that had accumulated on its plush surface - but I didn't! Ugh! The sad thing is that I contemplated if it could still be used. I came to the conclusion that there are enough germs in this world that I can't protect myself from, but when it's obvious that I can, then I should.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Washed Away

Today, after removing some clothes from the dryer and thinking if I ever have a lot of money I would never do my laundry ever again, I found a washcloth that baffled me. It was all torn up and ratty and had paint stains on it. It was like I had never seen it before; Mark was equally troubled by this curious washcloth. The only thing I can think of is that I used it when I painted our bedroom last summer and it got buried in the hamper until today. The other possible theory is that it's like the lost sock you find months later and have no idea where it's been (you know, the dryer ate it but finally gave it back). But, it seems odd to me as it was a fairly decent washcloth so I'm not sure why I would use it to clean up paint.
Anyway, I find it nasty and it's outta here!

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Brush away

We used to have a friend that stayed over a lot. We live within walking distance to some bars and he would overindulge and then not want to drink and drive. As a big supporter of this, he would sleep on our couch. He even stayed here during a dark period when a girl he dated broke up with him and he was devastated. Thus, our downstairs bathroom housed the toothbrush that we designated for him. Well, he hasn't stayed here in some time, actually, a long time. Thus, his toothbrush seems like prime eighty-sixing material. We do wonder what happened to him as he's fallen out of communication...every now and then we hear bits and pieces, but nothing substantial. I hope he has kept up with his dental hygiene.

Friday, March 18, 2011

No soap for you!

In the laundry room - way up high hidden from eyesight - I found a soap holder that was once in our shower. The thing about this soap holder is that it's broken. It used to hang on little suction cups on the tile wall, and somehow it was completely ripped off or something. It's beyond repair. It's been so long I don't remember what happened; nonetheless, it's completely useless and I've already thrown it in the trash.
I would take a photo of it but my issues are still not resolved in that arena.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Erin Go Bragh!

Ah yes, St. Patrick's Day. The day that even the palest of pale can wear the brightest of green. The day when the teatotalers forget that they teatotal. The day that everyone is handing out tons of kitsch and you are expected to accept it without thought or criticism. Tonight, at a St. Patty's tent part we went to, a girl name Casey briefly befriended me and adorned me with much kitsch: a St. Patty's Day Tiara, two glow-in-the dark bracelets in blue and yellow (as that makes green in case you failed the color wheel in kindergarten), and a pair of cardboard shamrock shaped glasses. As I don't need too much junk accumulating, I'm getting rid of the glasses tonight.I have a photo but my email is slow for some reason so I will put it up tomorrow.
Hope you had some green beer and enjoyed your St. Patrick's Day (even if you aren't Irish)!

Photo finally added March 19th! 

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Counter recycling?

The question tonight is this: What does one do with a "green" shopping bag when it can no longer be used? I'm talking about the shopping bags you take to the grocery with you so you don't have to get paper or plastic on the way out. Well, one of mine ripped today - as I always use them - and I was faced with this dilemma. I mean, I obviously can't keep a bag with a giant hole in it. And, it's not the type of bag that can be sewn up and fixed. When it's done, it's done. Thus, I found myself in a earth mama quandary today and I had to throw away one of these bags. It was weird. I'm not sure what it all means.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

The Ring (is always watching)

Ok, so I missed a post yesterday. That means I officially owe this blog two posts. I won't forget it!
Today, I'm eighty-sixing a ring I found next to my car one day in the parking lot. It's OK, but it's not something I would wear and it's a touch too small for me. I'm giving this away to someone, but I'm on the fence as to which person, but believe me, it's going. It really doesn't have many wear marks for sitting outside on the pavement for who knows how long. It might have belonged to a neighbor we had some time ago that wasn't very nice. Let's hope her karma hasn't worn off on it.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Not so much Ooh La La

I found a kit I bought so that you can give yourself a French manicure. You put these little lines of sticky paper just under where you nail ends. You paint your entire nail one color, and then you paint the space past where the sticky paper is, the very tip of your nail, a white color. The idea is that it will look like you've received a professional French manicure. Well, it's really just frustrating to even attempt to do this. The little stickies get stuck to each other, the natural nail polish bleeds into the white nail polish, and there really isn't a good result (unless you want to be angry). Thus, there is no reason for me to keep this kit. It's in a word: pointless.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Sarah

These are facts: A driveway is for parking; A parkway is for driving; My name is not Sarah. I was walking to the store today when a young woman said to me "Hi Sarah!" It was odd, because I didn't know what to do. I thought If I don't respond, this girl will seriously think Sarah is a major mean girl until she sees her again (if she even wants to see her again). Then I thought If I say something and act like I'm Sarah, does that make me crazy or am I just doing the right thing for Sarah's sake? If I do act like her will this person then try to have a conversation with me? Then, will it become obvious that I'm not really Sarah, but her dishonest doppelganger? I will leave it to your imagination as to what I did in this situation because that's who I am!
On to the eighty-six...our cats have lots of toys, but when they rip one to shreds it has to be trashed for the safety of them and for me - I can't afford a ridiculous vet bill for the extraction of something from my cats' intestines (believe me, it's happened before to the tune of $1200). Anyway, one cat toy in the trash for tonight.
Good night, Sarah!

Friday, March 11, 2011

Tea Time

I thought about having a cup of tea earlier this evening. I discovered some tea that expired in 2005. It brought me to the question: Can tea really expire? Anyway, it doesn't really matter as if you've had something since 2005 and haven't used it you aren't going to so why keep it? It was echinacea wellness tea (or something along those lines). There was a little, cuddly koala bear on the cover - because that makes sense. There were only a few packets missing. I think the problem for me is I just like regular tea, green tea, or earl grey...everything else is just kind of something I try once and never end up sticking to it. I feel bad throwing tea out, but it's so old I'm a little scared of it. Thus, it has been trashed.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Forced into naturalness

Every now and then I get an itch to wear a fake eyelash or two. I'm not talking the full set, like drag queens and the ladies of Jersey Shore wear, I just mean a couple extra lashes on the end to make my eyes look nice. Well, I was thinking about this Saturday and came across my lashes and the adhesive. I thought the adhesive would still be good - even though I've had it for years and haven't used it in a long time - but it wasn't. When I took the cap off it was like something had died in that little tube. And, when I squeezed the tube to force a little of the adhesive out, the smell was putrid. Needless to say, it went straight in the trash. I probably should have called Hazmat to properly dispose of it. I guess that's what I get for trying to be pretty.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Ouch

I'm fresh off a lovely dinner with my girlfriends - one of which is my friend Diane. If you've been following my eighty-sixing, you know I eighty-sixed a pair of satellite-esque earrings she bought me some time ago (can't remember exactly when). See "Satellite Feed" post from February 7th. After having a delicious dark chocolate and sea salt caramel together, I think all is right between us!
Anyway, tonight's post relates to the fact that almost nothing goes back into the package from whence it came. So, the real question is: Why do I keep the packages that once housed these objects that never return to their original home? Dear folks, that is the whole point of this blog, that my mind doesn't function like a normal person; a person that would say "I'm going to recycle this/throw this out because I will never use it again!" Okay, maybe a normal person wouldn't say they're going to recycle something, but they should! As I can't stop digressing, I will now get to it. I found a plastic cylinder that once housed and ice pack I bought after a calf tear. I know, ouch. Anyway, there is no possible way the ice pack is going back in this now too cramped cylinder. Thus, it is bound for the recycling bin.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

To Tweeze or not to Tweeze

There are good pairs of tweezers and then there are bad pairs of tweezers (and why are they called "pairs" anyway?). As with all things, when you buy cheap you get what you pay for; thus, today's eighty-six features a pair of tweezers I probably got for a dollar. You just can't pluck anything with these tweezers as they just don't have the sharpness on the ends to grab a brow hair. They've sat idle for some many months in our medicine cabinet and now I've decided it's time they are trashed. I won't miss them and I don't feel like they're something worth donating as that's weird and, like I said, they're useless.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Laser

Well, it seems yesterday - because I was working on another writing project - I forgot to eighty-six something. AH! Don't worry, I know in order to stay true to my resolution that means there must be two eighty-sixing ventures in one day coming up, but that day cannot be today as I'm too busy currently! But, today's eighty-six is one that always makes me smile. It's mostly because I don't know how someone found out that cats are completely amazed by laser pointers, but the fact that someone discovered this offers tons of entertainment for both me and our cats! But, alas, the lasers die and/or break quickly. The good thing is that you can buy them at any gas station for a couple of bucks and get right back to torturing, I mean playing with, your cat(s). But, today a laser has to be trashed due to, well, overuse. Don't worry, our cats definitely need exercise. I only feel bad when thirty minutes after using the laser pointer they are still staring at the wall wondering when the red beam will again appear!

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Expired

This weekend is all about paper clutter in my home environment. Yesterday, it was junk mail. Today, it's the coupon "area". I say "area" as I have many places I keep coupons, even a handy organizer I can stick in my purse, but most of them are stashed in between my stove and my knife block. I found some really old ones today - one that expired over a year ago that got lost underneath the other pile of coupons- and some that when I cut them out I must not have been thinking because I don't even buy that product (and never would). Again, this is all good timing due to the paper drive at the local park. While I do use coupons on a regular basis, I do find myself wondering why I cut so many out and they never get used. Anyway, while the actual getting rid of paper clutter may seem like a lame eighty-six idea, my kitchen table - another coupon "area" - and the original "area" between the stove and our knife block looks a lot better. Overall, I'm feeling pretty good about the way eighty-sixing has gone this weekend (even though this rainy weather isn't helping with my attitude).
Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

You've got junk mail!

It seems that every few months I accumulate mass quantities of junk mail that I stack on a desk, on the kitchen table, or here and there. I suppose I think it will just get rid of itself if I don't look at it. Then, one day, like today, I just realize it's out of control and the problem must be addressed. Over the years, I've become a favorite of many bleeding heart causes - I assume this is because my address was leaked when I subscribed to some magazine (probably Vegetarian Times as it seems like an easy target) or because I gave money to the Humane Society. Either way, it seems I get unbelievable amounts of junk mail. This evening, I went through all of it and sorted it out; I discovered that most of it truly is junk mail so it has been placed in my paper recycling bin. This is a good thing as they're having a paper drive at the park nearby; thus, this eighty-six is good for me, the environment, and my community. Ah...I'm feeling better already!

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Press On

Every now and then - like when one of my friends gets married - I feel like it's a good idea to buy a press on nail kit. The fact of the matter is that this is never a good idea. Unless you go to a nail salon and get your nails put on professionally - which I DON'T recommend as those places are not well regulated and I once knew of someone who had to have the tip of her pinky removed due to gang green from a fake nail gone bad - a nail will not stay put. And, it really makes sense if you think about it - you're trying to glue something over your nail to look like a nail. In my life, I've learned that most things that are layered on top of one another - wallpaper to give a good example - just don't end well (besides dessert, of course). So today I find myself deep in the hall closet again where I found a press on nail kit I must have bought in a weak moment for a special occasion. When I look in it I see that it contains most of the nails that came with the package, which simply means I put a few on and then said forget this and put the box away in the closet. For some reason I always think it will end differently; it never does.
So I say be proud of the nails you have - or don't have - and forget about this fake stuff.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Heartfelt

I have a million little trinkets I've received at conferences I've attended. Today, I part with a bracelet I received at a conference regarding women's health, more specifically, heart health. While I find this little bracelet to be cute, I'm not ever going to wear it. I do think my friend Heather's daughter might like it, because while it is red it's also kind of pink and that's her favorite color. Plus, what kid doesn't like gifts! The next time I see her I'm going to give it to her...now I need to find something to give her son so he knows I'm not playing favorites!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Broken Hearted

Now, I've never been one to throw away candy. I mean, that just sounds ridiculous. But, I've known there is a really old bottle of cinnamon red hearts up in my baking cabinet for a long time. I think it's probably been up there four years as I know I haven't used them in about that long. I think I haven't thrown them out yet because they are candy, and candy is delicious and surely somewhere it says it's a sin to throw a heart-shaped piece of cinnamon candy in the trash! I opened them and they still smell cinnamony delicious, but when I squeeze one the texture seems like it could break off a tooth. So, I find myself being a person I can't stand: a person that throws away candy. Well, I'm done shrieking and this candy is eighty-sixed as of one minute from this post. I think I will buy a candy product to replenish this one tomorrow as to not anger the candy gods.