Adieu, Pierre (je suis desolee)

I discovered today that our utensil drawer is ripe for eighty-sixing. Thus, I found this trendy meat thermometer in there that I either got for myself or my mom got for me:

Isn't his mignon (cute)! Anyway, Pierre, which is what I call him due to his French-like look, has been in the drawer for probably two years now without use. As I just said, I'm unsure if my mom got this for me or if I got it for myself as there's a temperature range taped on the back which must have been cut from the box Pierre came in and that seems like something either my mom or I would do (wow that was a long sentence!). The temperature range numbers on the back correspond to the guide engraved on Pierre's torso - very rare, rare, medium, med. well, well, pork/poultry. Again, I remember about two years ago when I took Pierre out to the grill to pierce a piece of meat and nothing happened. I checked his batteries - tucked cleverly in his chef's hat - but that didn't seem to be the problem. Thus, after that point Pierre's ability to accurately predict meat temperatures was haphazard and dangerous. It was frustrating to me, but instead of throwing him away I just shoved him back in the drawer. I suppose I thought with time he would heal (isn't that what happens to electronics?). Anyway, I saw him today and just realized if he isn't useful then he must be eighty-sixed. Thus, with that we bid Pierre adieu.